Keepin It Real Thursday...we're here..now what?!

Well this Thursday I'm left with a very real thought.  This whole year has been about preparing for this moment and it is now here.  Matt is starting his residency.  I am so excited for him and have loved watching him wear his new Dr. Murray name tag to go to orientation everyday.  Everytime I see it, I feel such a sense of excitement and pride for him...well for us really.  However, today I'm left with the very real thought of "what's next for me?!?!?"  I've been so wrapped up in getting our family here in one piece that I haven't really put much thought into what I'd be doing when we get here.

At the end of next week, our house in Mississippi will be officially owned by someone else and I am officially unemployed.  This is the first time in my life that I have no idea what I will do with the next three years.  I am a planner so I always knew it would be college, graduate school, and I even knew that I would work for DHS in some capactity as long as I lived in Mississippi.  It feels so weird now to be here and just not know.

Matt and I have decided that if my dream job comes along that I should take it, but if it doesn't come along right away that I shouldn't just settle into something that I don't really love.  This of course will only depend on whether or not we can pay the bills on his salary.  If we cannot, then I'll be getting a job whereever anyone will have me.

So for now, I think I "don't work outside of the home." What?!?!  I can't get used to this.  It's not that I wouldn't LOVE to be home and spending some time with John, but I have always been a working mom so that's what I know.  So many people have asked me since we moved here "what do you do?" and I always answer without thinking "I'm a social worker."  And I am a social worker.  But I guess I'm also a stay-at-home mom for the moment.

So I guess my current reality is limbo.  I'm a stay-at-home mama who is trying to decide what our new normal will be.  Will it be full time SAH mom?  Will it be finding the perfect full time job and the perfect daycare for John?  Will it be finding a great part-time gig?  Who knows!

Maybe uncertainty is freedom for me right now.  Maybe I need to experience a little bit of limbo to find the perfect fit for our family.  I think this may be the case, and I'm feeling blessed to have this moment to figure things out.

On another front...today is partner's day at Matt's orientation.  Wish me luck as I go participate in a session to learn about how little I will actually see my dear husband.  Not so excited to spend time listening to that, but very excited to meet the other "partner's." I need some friends!!

So that's where I am.  And that my friends is as real as it gets.

And for you John fans out there, I'd hate to dissappoint.  So when we moved here we eagerly took John to the beach (as he has always been our little water baby), and he was TERRIFIED of the ocean.  I guess it was the waves and the loud noise?  Well Matt and I went for a walk over the Halifax River and John seemed interested in checking out the river.  So this is the progression of him checking it out.

All dry! Just tossing sand into the water.

Deciding that he'd like to get his feet wet.

And maybe his knees.

Oh heck! I'll just sit down.

And we're all in! 

I guess he's a river rat afterall.

Keep it real y'all!