At 15 weeks, I am still continuing to shake the 1st trimester blues. I am definitely better, but not as "normal" as I thought I would be by this point. Usually I'm nausea free, but it still creeps in at night every now and then. I'm also doing better with the exhaustion, but I still can catch a good nap when time allows as well so I guess it's not totally gone. My normal self is not a napper. I usually can't fall asleep or fall asleep briefly and wake up feeling awful. This pregnancy has had me napping like a champ though.
The only major complaint that I have so far in this trimester is back pain. I had back pain by the very end of my pregnancy with John, but this time I have it all of the time and it's pretty significant by the night. I have learned a few tricks like sleeping with a pillow between my legs helps. My husband and the internet have told me that I just need more exercise. Thanks husband...thanks internet. Just what every pregnant woman wants to hear! I really am trying to get a walk in more though and get back to eating healthier now that I can stomach most things again. I'm not really having cravings that much, but I do love guacamole, bread, and all things gummy...fruit snacks, gummy worms, gummy bears.
The other exciting thing that has happened over the last week is that I can feel baby a good bit these days. I love those sweet little kicks and squirms. They make me feel so much more at peace and joyful.
How have I been emotionally you ask? Well I thought the answer was going to be much better, but I absolutely had another Sunday night melt down last night. I don't know if that's going to become a thing or not. :/ I definitely cried on Saturday during the finding Nemo show at Animal Kingdom, but I mean who wouldn't right? Yesterday I fought the urge to be sad since I was all alone on Mother's Day. Matt had to work, and we are so far from family. I ignored facebook mostly because it made me a little sad to see everyone together, and I was doing ok. Then Matt invited us to the hospital to have a fancy Mother's Day dinner of hospital food, and as John and I were heading out to meet him, I couldn't get the garage to open! It would open like a foot and then stop. All of our neighbors were out celebrating with their families I guess, and no one was home to help me. Meanwhile John starts crying about wanting to go see dad after I tell him that we might just have to see dad tomorrow because the garage won't open. So after an hour of finding the manual and trying to troubleshoot, I figured out what the problem was, fixed it, and we were on our way. I fought back the tears the whole way to the hospital. I told myself not to feel sorry for myself when really all I could think was "why does this always have to happen when Matt is on call?! Why me?!?! Wahhhhh!!!" After a delightful dinner of cafeteria pizza and a brownie and we were heading home, the tears couldn't stay in anymore. I cried most of the way home and then cried more when I got there. I cried about everything rational and irrational. I cried because it was a lonely day and I cried because I had to eat so much now. I have named Sunday, Sunday Non-Funday since it has become the day that I have to let it all out. As always, my sweet husband just rubbed my back and reminded me that I would feel better in the morning. He was right, and today I finally tackled deep cleaning our entire house! It felt amazing to see those dust bunnies go after an entire trimester of completely ignoring them.
Please forgive my current state of being, but here bebe is in all of his/her 15 week glory. I never look as big in pictures as I feel like I do in real life, but maybe that's a good thing. There's still so much time...
And that's all for now! Way more long winded than I meant to be, but when have I ever not been.
Much love!